Why Are You Afraid of Love?

I wrote about inter-generational trauma, emotional labor and femininity and masculinity after watching Beyoncé’s Lemonade. This piece went live on The Establishment yesterday. It’s my first paid piece and I’m very proud of it 😉

Here’s an excerpt:

I will never embody Blackness in the right way, and I will never embody the right image of a Black daughter. Long after my parents are separated, I watch my mother do the emotional work of 10 women. I see that for my father, this is not enough. I begin to interpret this work as birthright, or a facet of femininity.

I begin to conceptualize my father’s behaviors as inherent to masculinity. I carry this on top of my bones until it seeps into my skin and before I know it, my relationships. In some way or form, I become an image of my mother; finally understanding why it feels like some part of my attraction always has something to do with my dad.


[Image description: a lighter skinned woman with lots of thick, straight hair, clutching herself. The background of the photo is yellow in color. I can’t tell if it is Beyoncé, or someone who looks like her.]


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2 Responses to Why Are You Afraid of Love?

  1. tatyananduta says:

    You’re writing soothed, healed, challenged, inspired and a whole slew of other things im still processing. Thank you for sharing!

    • I’m so glad to hear that! That’s an incredible compliment and I’m so glad you were able to connect with it so deeply and then make the point to say so. I really appreciate it.

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